Acceptance and Change

There is a prayer by Rheinhold Niebuhr written in the 1930s which begins: “God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference.” I have tried to remember this good advice for many years now, first asking for help with the things I cannot change and then more recently learning about acceptance. However, here is an idea I have been exploring in the last month or so: that acceptance is sometimes the way to effect change. This is particularly in relation to situations that you know are not the way you want them to be, but can’t seem to change no matter how much time and effort and energy you throw at it.

I once read of someone who never unpacked their things when they moved into a flat because they didn’t plan to stay long, Five years later they were still there, living out of boxes, still looking for the ‘right’ place. It was suggested to them that maybe they needed to accept this place and ‘prove’ they could make a home anywhere, and within a month of unpacking they had found the perfect place.

We have lived with an open hanging rail for clothes for about seventeen years, always saying we would get a fitted wardrobe in our new bedroom so there was no point in doing more. I never liked it from the start, but seeing the sense of it went along with the situation; it was somewhat low down in my priority list for much of that time. But then one day earlier this year I looked at it and decided I had had enough of dusty, light-affected clothes and didn’t want to live with it any longer. Accepting that it was going to have to be there for a few more years, I bought some very cheap gauzy fabric and made some curtains to go around it, and found some plain polyester fabric to make a ‘roof’. Within a month of me doing this we had found someone to build our wardrobe, at a price we could afford. We did the finishing inside (as mentioned in an earlier blog post on ‘Trust’) and this month we moved in. The curtains never did get fitted and all but a very short section of hanging rail has now been removed. (I’m sure I can reuse them for something else!)

So how does this work? I can only presume it comes back to accepting What Is, fully, and then dreaming a new reality into existence. This is what I believe we need to do for the Earth. Accept, love everything on Earth as it is now, and from that point dream a new reality. Where there is connectedness not separation, where we recognise her divinity and that of everyone and everything on the Earth, where we stop trying to destroy that which supports us. We need a new way of seeing. But I am finding acceptance brings love and then wonders may happen.

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